The Cage
What does a cage feel like? That was the thought that ran through the girl's mind as her eyes scanned the room. All around her was the things that could have been, and may still be … haunting thoughts… loneliness... abandonment.
Hoping that her own efforts would warm the heart that began to freeze over...wishing that the others around her would not notice her longing glances. She closed her eyes and tried to think of the times when she was content...happy even to be the strong independent woman she had been drilled to be but now, she could only see herself as a scarred little girl, just wanting to be held in her mother's loving arms.
What does a cage feel like? That is the thought that ran through the girl's mind as it scanned each face, each set of eyes. Each held something that could not be explained, a certain something that she herself could not rationalize. What made her sink down, what made her feel uncomfortable in the place that was safe? What drained her mind and body as she turned her gaze from the eyes of her peers to the ground?
What does a cage feel like? That is the thought that ran through the girl's mind as her arms wrapped around the blanket that held her tight. Everyone was warm and happy...but her. What was this feeling that she accepted as truth, as normal? Why did she stay silent when asked, "Are you okay?” Was it the look in their eyes...the joy behind them? Was it the hope... the hope of something that could bring even more steps to the dance of the stars in the eyes of those whom she held dear? What does a cage feel like? That is the thought that ran through the girl's mind as she daydreamed of the life they led... but with her as the happy one. She would switch places, it was her joy to hold close the one whom she loved...and be held by the one who loved her back. But as the vision faded she realized she may never know the reason for such joy...such contentment.
What does a cage feel like? That is the thought that ran through the girl's mind as she realized that the answer to her question was right in front of her, in the eyes that held the question itself. A cage...anything that confines or imprisons, anything that holds back. As she looked upon the dazed faces of the pairs around her, she tucked tighter under her blanket, for what good is understanding if it can’t be satisfied or acted upon?
What does a cage feel like? This is what a cage feels like; knowing that the possibility of love, life and future, is just in front of you... but your own fear holds you bound, not only in a cage... but to it.
And the funny thing about a cage, is sooner or later you start to call it "Home", you start to become comfortable in the very thing that brings deep anguish. Some cages have rust, but if you stay long enough, and become protective...even possessive of your cage... you shine it up, make it gold. You find ways to cushion and pad, make a comfortable little dwelling place as you become content. The saddest thing about this is that now...even if someone were to open the door, why would you want to leave what has now become your protection? Why leave the known for the unknown?
So now we are back to the beginning. What is a cage? For if you wish to stay... and you find peace in a place that binds you... even if you are happy where you are...is it not still a cage? For what is it really, but a cage?
What does a cage feel like? That was the thought that ran through the girl's mind as her eyes scanned the room. All around her was the things that could have been, and may still be … haunting thoughts… loneliness... abandonment.
Hoping that her own efforts would warm the heart that began to freeze over...wishing that the others around her would not notice her longing glances. She closed her eyes and tried to think of the times when she was content...happy even to be the strong independent woman she had been drilled to be but now, she could only see herself as a scarred little girl, just wanting to be held in her mother's loving arms.
What does a cage feel like? That is the thought that ran through the girl's mind as it scanned each face, each set of eyes. Each held something that could not be explained, a certain something that she herself could not rationalize. What made her sink down, what made her feel uncomfortable in the place that was safe? What drained her mind and body as she turned her gaze from the eyes of her peers to the ground?
What does a cage feel like? That is the thought that ran through the girl's mind as her arms wrapped around the blanket that held her tight. Everyone was warm and happy...but her. What was this feeling that she accepted as truth, as normal? Why did she stay silent when asked, "Are you okay?” Was it the look in their eyes...the joy behind them? Was it the hope... the hope of something that could bring even more steps to the dance of the stars in the eyes of those whom she held dear? What does a cage feel like? That is the thought that ran through the girl's mind as she daydreamed of the life they led... but with her as the happy one. She would switch places, it was her joy to hold close the one whom she loved...and be held by the one who loved her back. But as the vision faded she realized she may never know the reason for such joy...such contentment.
What does a cage feel like? That is the thought that ran through the girl's mind as she realized that the answer to her question was right in front of her, in the eyes that held the question itself. A cage...anything that confines or imprisons, anything that holds back. As she looked upon the dazed faces of the pairs around her, she tucked tighter under her blanket, for what good is understanding if it can’t be satisfied or acted upon?
What does a cage feel like? This is what a cage feels like; knowing that the possibility of love, life and future, is just in front of you... but your own fear holds you bound, not only in a cage... but to it.
And the funny thing about a cage, is sooner or later you start to call it "Home", you start to become comfortable in the very thing that brings deep anguish. Some cages have rust, but if you stay long enough, and become protective...even possessive of your cage... you shine it up, make it gold. You find ways to cushion and pad, make a comfortable little dwelling place as you become content. The saddest thing about this is that now...even if someone were to open the door, why would you want to leave what has now become your protection? Why leave the known for the unknown?
So now we are back to the beginning. What is a cage? For if you wish to stay... and you find peace in a place that binds you... even if you are happy where you are...is it not still a cage? For what is it really, but a cage?
K. Maxine Baughman
|
Published by Gibson-Ragle Publishing Co.
www.facebook.com/Maxine Baughman
|